first post
It feels incredible to finally be free. For Niko’s whole life we have been trapped in a tiny room and now a two bedroom apartment feels like a mansion. I remember the first time I moved in to an apartment after living in a house my whole life and thinking how cramped I felt. It’s amazing what 10 years of supporting yourself will do for your perspective. Not that I ever had it easy or anything but I sure appreciate my two bedroom apartment a lot more now than I did when I was 15. I was a brat when I was 15 anyway. I have the television on in the background right now as I always do at night (for some reason it makes it less lonely after my son goes to bed) and this show is on with this guy hooked up to a lie detector test and they are asking him these questions about all kind of personal things. They asked him if he has put off having children with his wife because he isn’t sure if they will be together forever and his wife is sitting right there watching this whole thing. Now I’m not sure exactly how much money he was trying to win but I don’t think a few thousand is worth ending a marriage. The guy answered yes to the question so maybe it was worth it to him. I guess if he’s not sure about the wife anyway then maybe the money is of more value. Too bad he lost and didn’t win anything, except a pretty p.o.’ed wife. I really didn’t mean to get in to all that but I can’t believe the things they put on tv and not only that but the things people will do to be on tv and to win money. What good is being on tv when its only to humiliate yourself? Everyone will have fifteen minutes of fame. I think that is more of a truth now than ever. Reality tv. ha. It’s entertaining I guess but so so sad sometimes. I used to avoid watching the news because it made me sad. It’s like the car accident on the freeway that everyone slows down to stare at, well I am the person that speeds up. I have to correct myself, I was that person. Then I started reading true crime books. I borrowed a book from a friend about cannibal killers and became obsessed. In a way I think we are all fascinated by things we dont understand, either fascinated or afraid. I choose not to be afraid anymore. It’s much nicer.
